I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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