It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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