Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
