mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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