I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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