billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
