Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize