just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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