i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
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