i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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