Fuck appropriateness.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
