so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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