thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
