so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
