I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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