strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
