May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
