tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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