Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
