Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You should frame my arrest warrant.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
