How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
