How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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