i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
