I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
