so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I just blew my weed a kiss
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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