Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
