I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
