I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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