We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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