I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
