We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
