I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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