Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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