Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
