he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize