I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
