Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
