Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
