i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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