This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
