I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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