so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize