First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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