I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
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