People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize