how can u be prego again
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
