I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
