so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
