Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
