normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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